Day 6 - Deception and Self-Interest

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to walk with any type of integrity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use deception in self-interest to achieve goals that I have set out for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lend my services of deception to others in order to honor their self-interest.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that in aiding and abbedding others self interest I am actually acting in self-interest and not what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that when I am aiding and abbedding someone elses self-interest, I am in fact acting out of fear in the fear of not pleasing my parter, which shows that I do not live within equality equation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am acting in love towards my partner in  aiding and abedding my partner to help achieve her self-interested goal, instead of accepting and allowing myself to see/realize/understand that it is done in fact out of my own accepted and allowed fear of my partner 'not getting what she wants' and thus being 'upset'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the thought of 'my partner appearing to be stressed and upset'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myslef to connect the thought of my partner appearing to be stressed and upset, and the negative emotion of fear.

I forgive myslef that I havnt accepted and allowed myself to stand stable in myself when my partner does get stressed and upset.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that I have accepted and allowed myslef to get stressed and upset and outwardly project this onto others, causing others discomfort.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to suppress experience another being upset through trying to please another.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that when I people please in fear of that person being upset, I may contain it for the moment, however it does not mean that it will actually go away, as I will simply just supress it for the moment as it still exists within and as myself.

I commit myself to stop pretending in order to decieve and manipulate a situation for anothers self-interest.

I see/realize/understand that when I 'choose sides' and assist another to achieve their self-interested goals, and believe I am doing it in Love, I am actually doing it in self-interest/fear/separation within myself.

I see/realize/understand that in 'choosing sides', I am actually choosing separation/fear and opening the door for self-abuse.

I commit myself to stop the fear and choose only life and what is best for all in the moment.

When and as I see myself go into the fear of 'upsetting' my partner or not helping her to get her self-interested desires’, I stop and I breathe and I remain in the moment as the expression of who I am.

I see/realize/understand that when I shift into a character that does things to try to appease my partner, I am actually moving in fear and separation from myself.

I see/realize/understand that when I move in fear, I move in my own self-interest and separation.

I see/realize/understand that the actual experience of my partner being ‘upset and mad’ is not actually an experience of fear.

I see/realize/understand that fearing a thought is fearing myself and blatant separation and abuse in my world.

I commit myself to support myself to stop the fear of the thought of my partner being upset.